Why I live my life to “enough” not to the fullest

What’s on your bucket list? What do you want to accomplish in your life before you step off into the unknown? I don’t have a bucket list anymore, I use to. I had plenty of plans of places I would like to go and things I wanted to do. But I have begun to realise that none of that matters.

When you die of old age or a glorious accident scaling Everest at some point during your eulogy someone will say “she lived life to the fullest, embracing everyday”. I doubt anyone will say that at my funeral and I am completely fine with that.

I want my life to be enough. I want to be enough to my husband, enough to my children, enough to my friends and family, but most importantly I want to be enough to me.

Sitting at home on a Saturday night, saying no to events may come across to the fullest of people as wasting my life, but for me it is a crucial part of me living my life. I need timeout in my life. I need to escape in a book, sit on my couch under a cozy blanket, I need quiet. I could be going out discovering new places and people and “living my life to the fullest” but I don’t need any of that to say at the end of my life that my life was grand, because my life is enough.

I’m not saying don’t have dreams, quite the opposite really. I’m saying do what makes you happy, live life to your version of enough and understand that happiness comes from you, regardless of where you are and what you are doing.

Essentially Audrey

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